Most business schools in the United States require a GMAT score as part of the application packet. The GMAT is a standardized test that is offered by Pearson Vue. In the United States, there are Pearson Vue testing centers in pretty much every town worth some salt. Outside of the USofA, however, testing centers are few and far between. On the continent of Africa, let's just say there are maybe a handful.
Well. Since I decided to apply to business schools this year, it became apparent that I would need to take the GMAT somehow. I looked up testing centers near Kigali. The nearest one was 470 kms away, in Kampala, Uganda. Oh goodie.
In order to take the test, you have to sign up well in advance, and pay a $250 fee. Oh extra goodie. I signed up for the 10th of October, hoping I'd be able to study for the test and find a way to Kampala before then.
As it turns out, there's a bus that runs from Kigali to Kampala every morning. Since the GMAT on Saturdays are only offered at 9am, that meant I had to take a bus friday morning. Oh goodie - I could waste a whole vacation day taking a bumpy, hot, cramped bus ride to a city I was mildly afraid of. I was told to expect to spend at least 9 or 10 hours on the bus ride. Oh goodie goodie.
Well, surprisingly enough, the bus ride was rather uneventful. At the Kigali-Uganda border, we all had to get out of the bus, check out of Rwanda at the Rwanda counter, walk across no-mans-land and check in again at the Uganda counter. Since 50 zillion busses all leave Kigali at the same time, there were 50 zillion and a half people trying to cross the border simultaneously. I could have complained about that, but I didn't mind being able to walk around, buy some water, go to the oh-so-yummy-smelling bathrooms that were really just holes in the ground, and exchange money. I did eventually get to the check-in counter in Uganda, and, oh goodie, I had to pay a $50 fee for the visa.
We arrived in Kampala at about 5pm. It was 11 hours door-to-city-center. Thank GOODNESS for a friend of mine who lived in Kampala for several years. She lead me through the city's chaos - and when I mean chaos, I mean chaos - and deposited me on a mutatu that actually drove me to my hotel. Thank you Ameliah, you were a god send. The mutatu ride was only 1000 shillings, but the value of the money that was pick-pocked from our bags will forever be unknown.
Dinner and a chat on the phone later, I was tucked into bed for a good night's rest. Lucky for me, however, there was a party going on down the street that thought everyone in Kampala should reap the benefits. I got to listen to thumping reggae, hip hop, and random pop songs all night. Oh goodie. The music stopped around 7:30 am. At least it was pivotal in making sure I was awake on time.
I asked the hotel to get me a moto driver that would take me to the right college at the right university in Kampala so I could take my test. Freddie arrived at 8:05 with a bike and no helmet. Oh goodie. We drove through the city, weaving between gridlocked cars and cutting through gas stations to avoid traffic lights. At one point a cop tried to grab Freddie's shirt, and he put pedal to the metal while I hung on for dear life. Later, when we reached the university entrance we did an about-face and scrambled around a corner into a little dirt alley way between shacks selling phone credit and tomatoes. This time I demanded an explanation.
"Oh," said Freddie. "Those police men are trying to arrest me."
Oh goodie again. Not only was I scared for my life as we skidded through traffic, now I was aware of sitting on the back of a moto controlled by a fugitive. Fun fun.
20 minutes of driving around looking for the right college ("I know where it is!" said Freddie, a few too many times) he leaves me at the Faculty of Technology. Unfortunately, the testing center is in the Faculty of Information Technology. Meh. It was only on the other side of campus. Goodie.
Oh crap! It was 8:45!! My test was a 9, and according to the GMAT website, if you're not there at least 15 mins early, you forfeit your chance to take the test. Shit.
I hissed another moto down and told him to book it over to the RIGHT faculty. That was fun. Yet again my life was held in the balance as wind blew around my non-helmet-protected hair.
I got to reception, and there was a dude whining about how he paid the registrar, but he still wasn't enrolled. Whaa whaa whaa. I could hear my heart thumping in my toes. I kept staring at the clock on the wall. 8:54.... 8:55.... 8:56... Finally the dude left.
"The Pearson Vue testing center. Where is it?" I'd lost all sense of propriety.
"9th floor"
"Where's the elevator?"
"There isn't one"
Oh extra goodie.
I ran up the stairs like a maniac. I only had to stop twice behind slow-ass african-style walkers who took up the entire width of the stairwell. "Excuse me, excuse me" I said as I pushed past them with my african-style pushing-past skills.
I got to the door of the testing center at 8:59am. I wasn't 15 minutes early, but technically, I was there before my exam was supposed to start. Phew.
Shit.
The testing center was locked. I totally KNEW it! They had left already because I was late. Great.
I asked the dudes at the Thompson Prometric center also on the same floor if the Pearson Vue people were supposed to come by. "Oh, she doesn't come by on Saturdays." was the response I got. Oh extra goodie. I wondered if the printed internet receipt I had of the $250 I'd paid and the appointment information was going to hold any clout if I needed it to.
Back down the 9 floors to reception, I asked if I could please get in touch with the Pearson Vue testing center lady as it was extremely important that I take my test THAT day. I thought about giving the full sob story, but she stopped me by saying "Oh. She's probably late. She'll come. Just wait." Oh those famous African words. Just wait.
Ok.
Back up the 9 flights of stairs, I sat down on a oh-so-comfy chair made of metal spokes and random rusty nails. "TIA," I thought. "This is Africa."
Good thing I passed out during the hour and a half that I had to wait. I never would have waited that long otherwise. Seriously!
Well, at least she showed. At least I managed to take the test. By the time it was over, I was starving... but it was over. Finally.
I rode with the fugitive back to the hotel. Why not, eh? TIA, baby. TIA.
